"This is why the young people are leaving..."

A few days ago, El Nacional newspaper published a graphic photo of the conditions of a morgue in Caracas. The result was mixed, from outrage to quiet recognition. I have kept myself out of places like that and tried to avoid violent areas, but even so, I saw a cadaver on the side of the road one Saturday morning. A cadaver! I remember that we had to pass by that spot twice, so I was sure of what I saw. I was surprised by what I saw, but more surprised by the fact that I wasn't thoroughly shaken and haunted by nightmares. I just accepted what I saw as sad, and moved on.

No one, pro- or anti-government can deny that there is a serious problem with violence here. Anytime the topic is brought up in daily conversation, essentially every person has a disturbing story to tell, whether it be about something that happened directly to him/her or to a family member. I'm not going to share any of the stories; suffice it to say that most of the victims were not involved in illegal activities or anything of the like. They simply wanted to live a normal life. I don't think I will ever get to the point where I can understand this kind of violence.

Some people tell me that security and safety are a state of mind. I agree that how safe you feel and the way you live your life depends on your own perspective. But the facts don't lie- crime and homicides are widespread in Venezuela, which is very unfortunate for this beautiful country. I have grown to love a lot of things about this country and can only hope that they will find the way to move forward and make it a safer place.

Read this article for more information.

Hermano

I just saw the Venezuelan movie "Hermano" and will admit that it was a bit more than I had bargained for... but then again, it isn't the first time that I have felt that way this year. The movie is about two brothers who are fighting to get out of the poorest slums in Venezuela (and the biggest in Latin America)-Petare. Soccer is one brother's plan to get both of them out.

I'm not going to summarize the movie here, it really needs to be seen and experienced to be truly understood. I said before that it was more than I had bargained for because it hit too close to home. Throughout this year I have met different people who also want to "get out," whether it be figuratively or literally, and haven't been able to. Some of the people who study at my university are doing so in order to better themselves and provide for their families with one or two good jobs rather than four or five odd jobs. Other people simply do not see where they fit in in the current societal situation. Many have commented that they feel like they don't have an opportunity to grow and develop themselves personally and professionally here in Venezuela. but don't really have a choice. I can't begin to imagine the impotence they must feel.

It was one of those movies that taught me as much about myself as it did about Venezuelan life in Petare. The times that we have had to pass through Petare for whatever reason, we always did so fearfully, taking every possible precaution to make sure nothing happened to us as we drove through. We were suspicious of anyone who got too close. Forget getting out of the car. But as "Hermano" reminds us, the people living there are not monsters, they have just grown up differently than we have and have not had the same opportunities. However, I don't plan on driving down to Petare to lend a hand anytime soon, because I've realized that I really don't understand what life is like there and it would be pretentious of me to assume that I could make a difference without that understanding. "Hermano" gave me a glimpse into that world and boggled my mind, reminding me how much of the world I don't yet comprehend.

This entry is a bit scatter-brained because that's how the movie made me feel. Certain scenes keep repeating themselves in my head and I have a feeling they will for quite some time. I can't fathom having to go through what they did- one brother was abandoned as a baby and the other puts food on the family table with "dirty money," people they love are senselessly murdered.... I was not the only one who needed a tissue.

However, the message that shone through the whole movie was positive- the people that you care about are your family, and it is the most important thing you've got. That's the message I choose to take to heart.

Feeling Like a Kid Again

I never thought I would actually enjoy it. In fact, I thought it would disrupt my sleep and make me feel claustrophobic. That couldn't be further from the truth! In fact, I'll admit it- I love my mosquito net.

Right after I returned from a trip to Peru and Ecuador, I found myself about to be homeless, and frantically searched for a place to stay. Fortunately, my Rotary contacts came through for me, and I moved in with my good friends Pedro and Gina, who have a beautiful house and lush gardens and trees around it. I was a little bit nervous about the mosquitoes and other bugs that live in the gardens, as they tend to feast upon my foreign blood (it must be like filet mignon to them) and make me itchy for weeks.

Luckily, they have lived here for years and are well-prepared. I was instructed in the proper use of the mosquito net for my bed (make sure it covers the whole bed and doesn't rest on me, because they will bite me through the netting, check and make sure there aren't any bugs already in it before I go to sleep, and don't open it a lot if I get up to go to the bathroom) and tried it out. I slept like a baby the first night and felt this sort of power surge- the mosquitoes couldn't get to me! I fought the mosquitoes, and won, at least at night. This may not seem like a lot to other people, but it was a huge relief to be able to laze around under my mosquitero without a care in the world. Plus, it kind of felt like when I was a kid and constructed forts in the living room with chairs, sheets and cardboard boxes, something I haven't felt in a long, long time.

My "big kid" fort